I went through some of my Google Documents and found a speech that I had written out for Creative Con and never got to do. I had forgotten all about this, but it still rings true today for me. Enjoy.
I recently found a note in one of my many journals that listed my life goals. One of them was “Work on books, graphic novels and comics for a living” which I equated to about 50,000+ a year. I then had a secondary goal to “have a successful book franchise.” I then went on to describe successful as “award-winning, money-making, speaking engagement inducing”.
I only vaguely remember writing these goals down, but even now they seem a bit… lofty. I have not won any awards, made (really) any money from any of my books and frankly, I asked for this speaking engagement.
Art is a hard line of work. Many people will tell you this. I’ve listened to many authors who’ve told me how hard it was. I’ve seen salary numbers of people I view as having “made it” but something about the job… I continue to look at it like, “yeah, but that’s them. I can do better.” Now, ambition is awesome. Everyone should aspire to be great at what they love to do. My problem though, was that after 5 years, I hadn’t “made it.”
Hard work and disappointing results can be incredibly disheartening. You can feel like all you want to do is give up. That maybe you’re not “good enough” to be great. That maybe you should put your toys away and “grow up.”
But, in these times, I’ve found the most important thing to do is remember why you started. What was it about your art that made you start? What was your original idea? I mean, let’s go way back to when you were a kid (or if you are a kid, remember this for later). Was it coloring with crayons? Scribbling what you once considered “shapes”? Was it a great book? Was it that one time you told your friends a funny story and they laughed?
One of the best ways that I’ve been able to fight feeling of discouraged is to look back at some of my earliest kept drawings. Flip through some of my old comics/journals. You may never have shown them to anyone else, but I’ll bet there’s something you still love about it. I look back at even some of my worst jokes and laugh.
Then I write some more bad jokes. Jokes that are just for me, and I just leave them there in the back of a journal. For some people, it’s knocking out a few sketches of Boba Fett or Batman, maybe breaking it up altogether and writing a poem. The key is to take yourself out of the hard place you’re in with your current work, and work on something that’s just for fun.
In the end, that’s what I love about what I do. It’s fun. I write jokes and crack myself up. Sometimes, other people laugh too, and that makes me happy as well. But every time I start to feel like my drawings aren’t good enough or that I need better pencils, or an artists asks me what kind of brush pen I use, and all I have been using is a ball point pen and I have no idea what they’re talking about… I just remember that it’s not about all of that. Tools and technique are secondary to my passion for the craft.
There is something in art that has called you here. Something about writing or painting or drawing has brought you in today. Maybe you’re among the countless numbers of people that used to like art. Maybe long ago, or recently someone told you that you weren’t good enough. That your art was terrible. That your writing was bad. That your painting was juvenile.
I’m here to tell you that they’re wrong. You are good. If you’re on the verge of giving up your dreams, I’m here to tell you to wait. If you’ve given up already, I want to encourage you to pick it back up. You started with a passion. A love for the artform of your choice. Do you still love it? I’ll bet you still do.
Rediscover your love for art. Pick up a crayon and scribble with your kids. Ignore the lines. Pick up your favorite book and read it cover to cover. Write some terrible puns. Watch your favorite movie.
Remember why you started making art. Then do a little work just for yourself. Ignore the rules and the things you’ve learned for a while and just have fun. You can get back into the rules and regulations of whatever art form you choose later. They’ll all still be there for you, but for the time being, just have some fun. Take a vacation from what you know and try something new. Try something old. Don’t expect it to be great. Just expect the journey to be fun.
And once you’ve rediscovered the love for art you started with, you’ll be back at the stage where you’re willing to start again. You’ll be able to look at your work with fresh eyes, and likely you’ll have learned something. Then, as you work on whatever it is, just set time aside to work on fun projects that aren’t “marketable”. Because in the end, it’s all about your love of the art.